In the later part of 2018 I had just gotten a new job as a Database Manager for another nonprofit. It was so up my alley as I had done that for many years prior. I loved managing databases, running reports, helping, and serving my team, and the constituents.

A couple of months into the job I started feeling like something was not quite right physically. There was a certain amount of stress as there is with any new job, but because it was something I had always loved doing I felt sure it would pass. It didn't. I began to think I may have been in over my head, so I decided to resign. In a staff meeting the week I planned to resign, the CDO announced she was leaving. What?? Change of plans, I felt like I couldn't  'do that' to the department so I decided to wait until the new CDO was brought in. Bad Bad decision on my part - my brain and my body were quickly letting me down. 

One day while talking to a coworker I noticed my speech was a little off, slurred actually. She pulled me aside and said that she had noticed it a couple of times. Huh?? What is all this Lord? Then I noticed I could not for the life me concentrate, the brain fog was horrible. I picked up my laptop one evening to go home and it felt like it weighed 50 pounds. Then I couldn't walk very well, my legs felt like they had no strength and were going to collapse beneath me. Then my eyesight started getting weird, blurry and hard to even keep my eyes open. 

After MRIs and blood test, finally a diagnosis. I remember the day the new doctor, a neurologist, told me I had a rare autoimmune disease called, wait for it.... Myasthenia Gravis. "No known cause, no known cure." That was the beginning. This new doctor, the neurologist, (I'd never even heard of a neurologist up to that point) explained it all to me, it was like everything he said put words to every single thing I was experiencing in my brain and in my body. It was such a relief, yet at the same time there was no way I could have immediately comprehended the magnitude of how devastating and life changing this disease is. In fact, I remember driving home in the car after that appointment laughing out loud, saying "Lord, are you kidding me? 'A RARE DISEASE? ME?' yeah right..." 

In that visit that day the neurologist patiently and methodically explained a treatment plan. First, I would take drugs, which if you know me, you know I absolutely hate drugs, but if I had to take them for now, I would. (Take note of that 'for now' mentality) He also told me that he felt like if I had what he called IVIG Infusions on a regular basis I would go into complete remission. 

Okay, I give... what the heck is IVIG infusions?

To be continued! 

Lord Bless,

Barbie

Jeremiah 33:3